Going Out

Last night I went out … first time in 4 weeks!  Please understand, it’s not so easy to ‘go out’ when your doctor has just told you that the rest of your life will be on chemo, or you’re trying to navigate 14 different side-effects, or your white blood cells have completely gone missing.  Actually, NAHHHHHHH, those aren’t really the reasons.  It was 4 weeks ago that my nurse, Peggy, said I couldn’t drink for a while.  WHAAAAAAAT?  “Your liver function’s off.”    Luckily, last Tuesday my NP, Jen, said, yes you can drink …  just don’t overdo it.  YAYYYYYYY!

So last night my pal Aaron and I went to our favorite watering hole, Tortilla Flats.  It was a bit tricky getting ready.  I tried, but had not finished sewing a ‘cute hat’ (it looked more like a kitchen staff hat – not the look I’m going for).  So what to do?  My bare scalp is very visible, very noticeable through my scant remaining hair — and I don’t feel like drawing attention.  Tried on a baseball cap … also not the look I was going for.  Next, found some old fabric and tied it around my head … okay, better.  Made the fabric into a sort of headband with a bow thingy.  Putting the bow thingy near my ear was much better than on top … which made me look like little bo peep.  Okay headband/wrap/scarfy thing and LOTS of lipstick.  Several earrings too.  Distraction is good.  Excellent, all done.  And it would’ve been fine if the whole thing had stayed in place.  Apparently, when you are unfamiliar with having no hair, practice is imperative!

Before I left the house my sister, Kristen, asked me to send a selfie.   Took the pic and … YIKES … has my nose grown?!!  I swear, with the missing hair my nose is twice as big.  I’ve got dad’s nose AND receding hair line now?  No, Kristen reassured me, it’s just the selfie distortion.

Aaron and I sat at the bar and ate a boatload of food.  I had one fabulous margarita.  The man sitting on my other side, Kevin, started chatting, and he said my hair looked fine, that it really wasn’t noticeable.  He reassuringly grabbed the strands poking out behind my headband.  (Umm,  I’ve done that too, and it feels like you’re grabbing a few pigeon feathers, three at most.)  But Kevin was so, so positive and lovely.  No, he was not trying to pick me up … men do NOT pick up cancer patients, TRUST ME  (more on that subject later!!!).  This man, Kevin, is married and we just have a lot in common – his husband has cancer.  Kevin and I are now Facebook connected : )

So the head wrap got a bit disheveled, and my belly got over stuffed, but the night was great fun.  I’ll keep working on the ‘cute hat’ … might want it tomorrow;  during the day I’m canvassing for a local politician … don’t want to scare  the voters.  : )

BEST!  … Kaki

why does it keep sliding back?

2 Replies to “Going Out”

  1. Sounds like a fun evening!

    So I have a question: would you consider shaving your hair off? As a way of fighting fire with fire, so to speak? You don’t have to answer if this seems insensitive and I don’t mean to intrude. I’ve always thought (if I was on chemo and knew that it was going to happen) I’d shave my hair off before it could fall out just. out of … defiance. Or something. But maybe that’s not how it works?

    1. Hi Manjula! YES I’ve considered shaving. In fact I cut off two big chunks of hair to make a fringe for my ‘cute hat’ (that umm didn’t work out so well — let’s just say loose human hair and hot glue guns are a tricky combo — I did manage to glue some hair to my fingers though : ) Plan was to shave or chop really short after chopping off the two chunks. But I don’t have an electric shaver and I ran out of steam. That was two days ago and since then it looks like I MIGHT be retaining this thin crop of hair which makes a better ‘fringe’ than the glue gun version.
      So I totally get that impulse to shave and be done with it, but as of today I’m going for the ‘attached’ fringe. Thanks for asking! … Kaki

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